Wednesday, February 24, 2010

i never said i wasn't unusual

She balances with great ease between what knowledge is, and what knowledge isn't. Distinguishing the two is almost as easy as saying true, or untrue. But it isn't that easy, because truth cannot be defined for others, but by individuals themselves. The basic idea of truth is understood to be representable, but as far as the equal representation of understanding, truth like all words, are defined through single minds.

I would argue then that my experience learning leaves me with one important critique, that half of it may or may not have been facts based upon an equal collective. History, Art, Philosophy, English in the expressive modes are subjective, mainly to the men who wrote them all.... Institutionalized pumping of classes, sometimes works like a machine, pumping student after student to make sure that these books, are understood, generalized, and true with meaning. By the end of the assembly line, a person is expected to be gay, or straight, democrat, or republican, single, or married, a drinker, or not a drinker, sexual or not? Based upon what? what they told us..... This irrational practice of education makes it hard for a widened eye to blink away for a second. The single blink would put them back into a different reality, the abyss of your darkened lids where the mind makes its decisions, without influence except your own bodily gut feeling.

So when I continue on in my further and future education the point of this all is to refect on how not always, is the larger institution safe. Being a small fish in a big sea is not easy, but at least its harder to stand out, which makes you awesome.

This random thought is dedicated to the future projects, goals, plans, for the rest of the year 2010. More to come late, of course.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Rock to wish upon a STAR

this ONE time....

Two beer stained lips, exhale deeply her last cigarrette to settle thoughts of stress and recreate thoughts about the possibilities within a clear lit night, which as usual, is endless. The drunken call of Friday night echoed against her house from the street, only to remind her of the annoying empty conversations waiting if she should join this stumbling rant of excessive giggling and insecure, uninteresting, intentions.
Her house,which was snug fit in between the HEART of the universe, and somewhere else, somewhere chaotic. The night caught her ears attention like a tear to a cheek, listening to the noise of youthful spirits exploding with lost inhibitions, and alcohol. To no debate, it was just that, a blur of lost souls searching for something and never sleeps till it does, or passes out.. Even if she does decide to avoid the jungle around her, the orchestra of music humming from the venue down the ally, is a predator, to the inner rockstar within and will draw her to the streets immediately...

tap by tap

beat by beat

So she walks towards the noise... we've all seen Jumanji

This is how the story begins, It was all a Purple haze, but a buzz gone right, and a craving satisfied into a swirled hallucination of events that changed the night completely. Resting on the secure notion that her addiction to cigarettes is a mini adventure by a craving to drive late at night and satisfy the demon inside, the lady of the evening drove and crashed right into a random act of awesomeness. Upon entering the gas station nearby, she could not avoid the sound of music creeping its way like smoke into her right ear. Forcing her head to adjust, the instinct of wanting to hear things louder, therefore clearer.

The show was forcing an uncontrollable beat in her hand meditating her heart, tapping her index finger on her thigh to immitate this rare oddity in sound..... It didn't really matter who was playing at that point because it felt good. The night was already in her favor for finding something to satisfy her need to love the moment, and let the music take over, careless, and blind like a rockstar with thick shades on to disappear from the lights of the paparrazi. She went to the concert, and stood right up front, secured herself anti anxiety medication with a few drinks right away. At that point she was just hours away from a different reality, and ready to let the lights turn down low, and the waves of music crash decibal levels from the instruments immortal barrier breaking beats.

Somehow, this calms and smooths tension built up at work. DROID..... The music felt good on her body, and she knew this because they mimicked the lights, and she would swear her heart beat mimicked as well. Maybe it was the other way around and the lights mimicked the music.

After departing the show, she found herself waiting for a friend to get done in the bathroom and stood patiently leaning against a table, reached her elbow up slowly, but effortlessly, embracing her buzzed body upright. As all do, deny non sobriety, her intact eyes widened and ears slowly calmed from a what was seen as en endless ring.

She is a Virgo, detail oriented, observing, naturally acting as such she noticed a man....

who was dancing. Moving so slow, it didn't seem as if he was touching the ground. Then this smooth motion was stopped, he froze, ice, cold. But after for what seemed an eternity the ice shattered and his whole body muscles went limp and motioned back into a rhythmic dance. He was dancing, beautifully..... but, no one really noticed because of the almost empty venue.....
the concert was over,
and the music was gone...

This detail forced a smirk on her face and she then sat satisfied on the ending of a good night, and. But it was not over. It was just the beginning. Someone approached this lone being, not unusual and began asking questions about her night. she discussed. He was interested in the random fate that drew her to the show..

Ah, the catch. He was the sound guy for the band. But despite a wise first instinct, she gave him the right number.

But that was enough, walk home.

Only to be interrupted by three wise men, with treats full of surprises. Cookies that were special, and transforming to the ora of the evening. Did I mention that these cookies were free... Upon sharing a bottle of champagne on the streets openly, she made new friends, and entertained themselves in the abyss of time, for about an hour.
but before we leave them, a tale of irony.

The lone dancer she saw earlier, passes by. The three wise men laugh as they tell her they are both eating the same magical cookies. Odd that at one point, a large separation had existed between her and the man who was dancing alone. But some how were still connected. But that is not the end. The man from earlier calls her....

In fact there is much more to tell, but I will leave you like the memory of most evenings go. Lost in a black out, somewhere. I wonder where we go when we black out? Because its' not reality. ...

But this random act of awesomeness would have not existed without the trusting condition of randomness, and acts of such as being benefitial. This is why music was created, you were meant to hear it.

Time to start a fire

I begin similar to the strike of a match, disturbing like the bystander who lights a cigarette next to children, to spark a flame-like explosion of my past, present, and future thoughts, filled with long awaited secret desires and attractions. I hereby declare myself "ging-curious"....

A luring mystery lies in my imagination, about the vibrant exotic, crimson qualities within Red HAIR.. To me it is biological, hormonal, chemical, and a predetermined attraction that I can't control, an instant process of synaptic compulsions stimulating lust as I cross paths with someone who has red hair.... Im drawn to the way it mimicks FIRE, my poison apple, tempting to touch with consequences to follow. The curls of passion, stimulates the minds of those who desire to touch, something they once thought was untouchable, in fear of burning. in fear....of hurting.....Fire, is no longer touchable to immortals.


Naturally, the indifferent are characterized as such, singled out, and categorized into a group, associated towards negative and not normal. Critizised for not possessing the same standards of beauty as the public. I speak only in reference to the negative thoughts purely. I do not mean to generalize that all concepts of red heads are always seen in this way. However, I do recognize the following.

I am "Ging Curious" because of conversations overheard, participated, read, and/or seen on shows like South Park, and/or other ridiculous TV shows, internet videos, and You tube....

1. what if all the freckles connected together holds the key to the universe? (Sike, had to throw it in)
2. What would my kids look like?
3. Is the red hair dominant.....all over..... (dont shake your head...everyone has thought this maybe once...eyelashes to...asses.)
4. Why would I not be attracted to something that looks best in the sunlight.... Red hair, in my opinion looks beautiful in the daytime like glass...or a diamond.
5. who cares???

It is time to come out of the cabinet of curiosities, which has forever been sealed by judgments. It is time to recommit to a new understanding of "red heads". I understand why a wandering eye links to hair that shines just as bright as the sun, but yet still has skin soft like a virgin, naturally sensitive, but easily bruised...

Genes can never really go away until all people containing that gene are dead, and no longer reproduce. So there is hope that this recessive genetic wonder will be around forever. But remember that nothing gold last forever, and nothing red headed does either.....

Random Act of Awesomeness, for Red Headed appreciation.....

call me...